Quotable Moments
Tom
“So what are you doing here, Mister?”-a bartender
“Don’t you think ‘Hold my beer’ is a better way to start a fight than ‘Hold my water skin?’ By the way, hold my beer.”-Tom, shortly before starting a bar fight
Aaron
“Look over there! The king’s in a dress and doing the cancan!”-Aaron, to a guard who caught him stealing from the royal palace
“Not again! My lord, this is most unbecoming!”-the guard
“Again? What?”
“What?”
Cleo and Tom
“You harm a hair on her head, and you’re dead!”-Tom, to a villain
“Oh, Tom, I knew you cared!”-Cleo
“Well, yeah. You’re a friend. I can’t just let you die. That would be awful.”-Tom
“How romantic.”-Cleo, sarcastically
“Hey, I’m saving your life. You could at least pretend to be thankful.”-Tom
Tom and his unintentional interactions with the breasts of women
“Aw, dammit.”-Tom, after each and every accidental boob grab incident
“How dare you!”-Kristin, shortly before slugging him in the face
“Tom, this is not the way to woo me.”-Cleo
“Ummm…this doesn’t seem right.”-Catalina
“So, you like the goods?”-Alice
“I know, man. Boobs are great.”-Mei
Dustin
“What’s the matter? You don’t have any friends? That’s not right.”-Dustin, to a lonely child
“But aren’t you the paragon of isolation, Dustin? Don’t thrive on loneliness?”-a traveling companion
“I fail to see how that’s relevant.”